Breathe. It seems I really haven't had time to do much of that these days. So much has happened since the beginning of the year. It's hard to believe that it's already April. I know I've been scarce around these parts as well and with good reason. Life has handed me a whole lot of 'yuck' lately and I suppose I could take the obvious route and wallow in my own misery. But, I've got this cute little face looking up at me everyday, so it really doesn't seem all that bad now does it. ^_^
A little update.......As most of you know my wee one, Matthew, joined us on February 26th and had quite a battle to endure from day one. He spent a 3 weeks in NICU as he was diagnosed with Hirschsprung's disease and had a successful surgery to correct the problem. He was discharged on Friday, March 19th and we joyfully brought him home. We had a relatively normal weekend and then had to rush him to the ER with an infection in his colon on Sunday, March 21st. I spent every minute with him in the hospital and literally went home only for a couple of hours one day to see my family. Matthew was recovering well and the dark cloud that had cast over our little family seem to finally be lifting.
Well, that little cloud turned into a darker, bigger cloud for me. It was a little after midnight on March 26th and I was at the hospital feeding Matthew when I got the call. It was my Grandmother on the phone, calling to tell me that my sweet Grandfather had died. My Grandpa Matthew, the man who helped raised me, who I had know as 'Dad', who I named my newborn son after, who meant the absolute world to me, was gone. He had been suffering from Parkinson's disease for many years and I watched a big, strong, powerful man slowly become weak and enfeebled by this disease. He was completely bed ridden by February and my Grandmother had hospice care at their house to assist her. It was only a matter of time, but I thought I would have had the chance to see him one last time and tell him all the things I wanted to tell him. My dream was for him to see the baby as well, but I suppose that wasn't meant to be.
Matthew was discharged on March 27th with a clean bill of health and then it was off to Florida to join my family in saying goodbye to our beloved Patriarch. We paid tribute to him on April 3rd, the day before Easter Sunday.
I feel like I've been on auto-pilot since my son was born and its been a little difficult to get back on track. I have only happy memories of my grandfather and those times fill me with such relief and happiness, knowing that he lived a full life. I'm so grateful that he shared his life with me.
Our baby boy is such a joy and he's doing wonderful! Thank you to everyone for all of your prayers! He's eating well and finally nursing! If I didn't have him and my Bella, Elijah and Mel, the loss of my Grandpa would have been that much harder to bear. I've got so many happy distractions......and that has made all the difference.